Demi Lovato On Her 'California Sobriety,' Queerness and 'Needs'

The singer said she used a "feminine façade" in her past because she doesn't identify as a "sexy pop star."

Demi Lovato opened up about her struggles with addiction, sexuality and body acceptance.

During an interview on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" with guest host Ashley Graham, the 28-year-old singer  --  who overdosed in 2018 -- explained how she came to be "California sober," which refers to abstaining from drugs except marijuana and alcohol.

"This term is something that like I personally identified with on this journey of finding a middle ground," Demi began.  "I've dealt with so much struggle when it comes to addiction -- whether it's food, whether it's substances --  and this all-or-nothing state of mind -- like good versus bad foods -- I can't."

"If I don't apply that with my eating disorder recovery, why is that going to work with anything?"

Regarding her eating disorder, the former Disney star elaborated on coming to terms with "body acceptance" over "body positivity."

"My weight has been up and down and it's gonna probably be up and down. And I'm okay with that. I'm happy with that."

Demi also detailed how her queerness revelation changed her life dramatically, but in a healthy way.

"I noticed that a behavior of mine was jumping into relationships with men," she claimed. "And a relationship -- to other people and especially to me -- looked like stability, but that's not always the answer."

"I actually found stability more on my own," she continued. "Honestly, I'm not looking for a relationship or something."

"I got needs," she added with a laugh. "My needs need to be met at some point. So that's going to happen. And I'm excited for that. That'll be fun. But in the meantime, I'm chilling."

As for taking a new direction with her music, Demi explained she was always chasing a "hit song" in the past, but now feels more authentic in her artistry.

"Yes that was me to a certain degree, but it was me with the feminine façade of playing the role of the sexy pop star. I just don't identify with that."

Watch Ashley and Demi try some watermelon-smashing therapy at the end of their chat in the video above!